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Hmmmmmm . . . . Christmas is coming sooner than I realized last week. Although there
are some 26 days left until . . . thus each being one of a base-26 system, . . . . . .I'm
on a once-a-week system, thus base 4. Interpolating proposed posts as the factors of
an equation thus means that I'll have only three postings prior to Christmas.
And so I'll herewith provide the first of installment of my . . . .
OH HOLLY GOLLY T'YOU FROM ME
THIS CHEERY CHRISTMAS TRILOGY (part I)
. . . . . . AN’ WE’RE OPEN ALL NIGHT
‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the mall
The shoppers were jammed, movement barely a crawl.
The products were piled on the counters sky-high
(the third world’s now our sweatshop . . here we downsize and die
but such cultural extinctions sure make profits fly!!)
I in my office and salesforce on the floor
All but cringed as the rabid mass swelled in our store.
Suddenly over by toys such an augment of din
That I jumped from my desk to see what had come in.
And what ‘midst the clamoring brats did appear
But an eighteen-wheelered sleigh powered by 400 reindeer,
A tiny round guy (red suit, red nose, cheeks) heaping stuff in the rig . .
And I smiled ‘cause I knew that his bill would be big.
Years ago not the case, but now he’d not fail
To get all his stuff at our Christmas-eve sale.
He comes to get fabulous deals off our shelves
Since he’s found out the discount stores are cheaper than elves.
(cancerous growths on suburbia tearing cities apart
are the Targets, Sears, Macys and , far worse, Malwart.)
But what atmosphere!! By professionals styled.
Plastic snow, trees, plastic wise men, plastic mother and child.
By now Santa had chosen a fortune to heft
For folks who have at least one credit card left.
He endorsed a check which he handed to me
As he chuckled . . . . ‘twas a federal subsidy.
Then he revved up his sleigh and the startled mob squealed
And he mashed through their midst as the reindeer hooves peeled.
On upward he soared like a quantum-leak
Of an excess of half-life between resource and dump.
(a red dwarf’s now the star and such waste, crap, and cash
shine the little Lord Jesus on his birthday night bash.)
Through the ceiling he crashed with nary a linger.
And on up toward heaven like a symbolic finger.
Then he screamed as he vanished in the smog o’er the mall . . .
“MERRY HERESY CHRISTMAS TO ONE AND TO ALL..”